And then it gets real . . .

It is now 6:39 p.m. on a beautiful Saturday and I am grateful to be able to function at a low level once again.  Sometimes your own posts become your best medicine!  I am so glad that I had the opportunity to explore the topic of suffering before two hellish nights.  Sigh.  Perhaps this suffering shall pass in time . . .

Low Dose Naltrexone, a compounded medication used off-label to raise a person’s pain threshold and boost the immune system of someone with an autoimmune disease, is now ruled out for me.  Just 1.75 mg taken at bedtime the past 2 nights was enough to set off violent seizure attacks!  Oh yeah, I’ve had some of these attacks more often lately, but not for 1 1/2 hours in a row with hardly a break to breathe!   The duration was much longer this morning with longer breaks in between additional episodes.  After 2 hours then 3 hours then 4 hours of sleep, “I am able to function at a low level once again.”  This saga is a bite in the shorts for sure.  I AM FRIED.

So what did I learn here?

First, it’s time for more than one-half of a day break after completing one treatment regime before beginning the next one!  Healing from a chronic illness is a process, not a race.

Second, it’s time to simplify my daily routine even more.  Cleaning the entire house every week is just not going to happen for awhile.  This is a bummer since I am paranoid about dust accumulating, since we completed the mold remediation of our home.  Maybe the dust is cleaner now?

Third, it’s time to ask for help when I need it and not just from my husband.  A few ladies have offered assistance over these past 2 years of illness and I have rarely accepted it.  Maybe I could use help with a few things during this particular time.

Fourth, I must continue keeping my mind filled with scripture, Christian music, Christian messages and uplifting images to ward off the temptations and lies of the Evil One.  I must not fall into despair.  I must not keep apologizing for the effects of an illness that are clearly out of my control.  I must live as though the Lord is creating a masterpiece from the fragments of my shattered life, picking up each piece as if it were a treasure and not another burden.  God will use this for His glory and my good.  I must hang in there for the finished work.

Fifth, I must keep writing, including the good, the bad, and the ugly.  And when I do, I will continue to leave my gentle readers with hope by the time I reach the last period.  To write has been an incredible salve for my wearied frame, my wearied mind.  My soul, well that’s already in the hands of my Savior.

I am hungry again!  But it’s more-than-time for an Epsom salt-and-baking-soda bath and a shower!  Perhaps the Beanitos chips and unsalted dry roasted whole cashews I just ate for dinner while writing this will tide me over just a little longer?  Hope so.

Seeya next time, perhaps with better news.  :J

Elle gets a real job

Elle gets a real job

4 thoughts on “And then it gets real . . .

  1. Thanks for sharing your heart Julie. Praying for you.

  2. Keep courage! And don’t be afraid to take the offer of help. Sometimes it is so hard to accept assistance when we need it, but we forget that we may be robbing the other person of the blessing of giving

    • Thank you Jennifer! Gratefully my strength started returning much later this evening and I talked things over with my hubby. He wants to help more so that’s cool too. I appreciate your remarks about the “blessing.” :J

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