This morning as I watched my gracious husband take pictures of the items a family member had claimed were stolen, I realized I had no other place to go.
Who would understand the betrayal after having suffered a severe health setback trying to care?
Who would understand that every level of commitment virtually every day this entire year would end with them throwing my heart against a brick wall?
Who would know the many levels of loss that continue as I seek treatment to get my body back to baseline again?
Who would understand that grieving this failure, this dead end would rekindle the sorrow from heartaches in the not-so-distant past as well?
How does that come to any kind of closure when your heart is crying, your thoughts are heavy, your body is aching, your world is smaller, and there are piles of things to do around you?
There is only one place to go: to the One Who grieves for my pain, Who grieved tears of living blood for the sorrows of us all: more than I will ever know.
My Savior, Jesus Christ, faced ridicule, betrayal, torture, and unjust punishment that cost Him His life so that I may be free one day of lesser losses that come with this life.
Just gotta lie at the foot of His cross for as long as it takes until the burdens are lighter, so that I may go on even better somehow.
My joy is tiny today. My Jesus is bigger than life itself.
Jesus, take the wheel.