Full Moon Follies

My beloved qualified as my “Night in Shining Armour” last night.  If only it were for a victorious time instead of quite the opposite . . .

One would hope that significant interventions to quiet my inner storm would start working already.  Or at least tame the tempest beast when challenges such as noxious exposures and the mysterious workings of a full  moon come along.  I have read a hundred or more testimonies of the latter:  that for persons battling chronic disease, symptoms can worsen around the time of a full moon.  Perhaps it coincides with the life cycle of various bacteria or parasites?  Who really knows?  What I do know is that the worst of everything came forth and both of us are pretty beat up today from the lack of sleep along with the emotional and physical trauma.

  • Continuous convulsive spikes of every dimension
  • Headache, joint and muscle pain, ringing in my ears, dysarthria, bradykinesia, left-sided parasthesia, hypersensitivity to sensory stimuli
  • Visual anomalies (spots of bright lights when my eyes were closed)
  • Cognitive slowing
  • Difficulty breathing and communicating
  • Incredible frustration and discouragement leading to hysterical crying and anguish
  • Neurological collapse requiring maximum assistance with feeding, toileting, and dressing
  • Eventually passing out in bed around 2:30 a.m., partially dressed with no recollection of falling asleep

The 100% THC-free CBD oil provided a temporary pause in seizure attacks as did a large dose of liposomal Biocidin.  The entire episode finally ended shortly after taking my (3rd) nightly dose of Low Dose Naltrexone.  I must add that the only positive part of this experience was when I could open my eyes and saw my hubby in his night clothes as he cared for me.  I liked that!

Please pray for us.  We are exhausted.  The demands of life go on just the same.  My MRI with NeuroQuant study our of State will be delayed due to severe weather expected tomorrow; I am hoping to reschedule the appointment for later in the week.  Let’s hope that the NeuroQuant and the updating of multiple medical tests this month will be fruitful, Lord willing.  My Jesus goes before us and sees us through it all.  I trust in His timing, His plan for our lives.  Thank you for praying.

And thank you Steve for your heroic love and care.  May the Lord carry you today.

We wait on the Lord this day and always as we try to figure this out!  This illness is killing us. JJ

And then it gets real . . .

It is now 6:39 p.m. on a beautiful Saturday and I am grateful to be able to function at a low level once again.  Sometimes your own posts become your best medicine!  I am so glad that I had the opportunity to explore the topic of suffering before two hellish nights.  Sigh.  Perhaps this suffering shall pass in time . . .

Low Dose Naltrexone, a compounded medication used off-label to raise a person’s pain threshold and boost the immune system of someone with an autoimmune disease, is now ruled out for me.  Just 1.75 mg taken at bedtime the past 2 nights was enough to set off violent seizure attacks!  Oh yeah, I’ve had some of these attacks more often lately, but not for 1 1/2 hours in a row with hardly a break to breathe!   The duration was much longer this morning with longer breaks in between additional episodes.  After 2 hours then 3 hours then 4 hours of sleep, “I am able to function at a low level once again.”  This saga is a bite in the shorts for sure.  I AM FRIED.

So what did I learn here?

First, it’s time for more than one-half of a day break after completing one treatment regime before beginning the next one!  Healing from a chronic illness is a process, not a race.

Second, it’s time to simplify my daily routine even more.  Cleaning the entire house every week is just not going to happen for awhile.  This is a bummer since I am paranoid about dust accumulating, since we completed the mold remediation of our home.  Maybe the dust is cleaner now?

Third, it’s time to ask for help when I need it and not just from my husband.  A few ladies have offered assistance over these past 2 years of illness and I have rarely accepted it.  Maybe I could use help with a few things during this particular time.

Fourth, I must continue keeping my mind filled with scripture, Christian music, Christian messages and uplifting images to ward off the temptations and lies of the Evil One.  I must not fall into despair.  I must not keep apologizing for the effects of an illness that are clearly out of my control.  I must live as though the Lord is creating a masterpiece from the fragments of my shattered life, picking up each piece as if it were a treasure and not another burden.  God will use this for His glory and my good.  I must hang in there for the finished work.

Fifth, I must keep writing, including the good, the bad, and the ugly.  And when I do, I will continue to leave my gentle readers with hope by the time I reach the last period.  To write has been an incredible salve for my wearied frame, my wearied mind.  My soul, well that’s already in the hands of my Savior.

I am hungry again!  But it’s more-than-time for an Epsom salt-and-baking-soda bath and a shower!  Perhaps the Beanitos chips and unsalted dry roasted whole cashews I just ate for dinner while writing this will tide me over just a little longer?  Hope so.

Seeya next time, perhaps with better news.  :J

Elle gets a real job

Elle gets a real job