The Trip That Wasn’t

The best plans with reservations and all

Lain ready for some last minute cooking, packing, and prep

We would camp in the rain in a humid State down south

And see my Dentist, my Aunt, and maybe a friend.

But as much as we tried to make it all happen

This trip was simply not meant to be this time around.

Ten days ago I got pneumonia and treatment began thereafter

Oral antibiotics then IV infusions of same

With more drugs than I care to mention to manage the symptoms.

I had forgotten since my last bout with same in 2009

Just how dangerous and devastating a lung infection can be.

So rather than risk infecting my Aunt with her own health issues,

And delay my own healing with the rigors of 4 day-long car rides

We won’t be going nor helping out my Aunt until much later instead.

This isn’t really a poem, just some prose to get it out of my head

I am exceedingly disappointed, confused, and not sure what to do instead.

Rest of course.  Try to get our home back in order from being away at the hospital each day

Let go of the questionable care from nurses who didn’t know or care that much about me

And rekindle the love with my River Bear who makes it all alright anyways.

How can one make sense of plans gone awry:  it just doesn’t seem right

Well my Lord’s already there, so in Him I will trust.  He’s had my back every other time!

JJ

 

What is most important

What is most important?

This is a question that marks my days no matter what my state of mind or health.  Every day for as long as I can remember, I got up and set goals for my waking hours.  Even if I have to modify them over and over again before the day is done, I have a mental list of what I hope to do.  It’s just how I am wired.  Some things get written down and some do not.  Before long I meet with the Lord and we go over things.  Usually some changes follow!

Proverbs 16:9 New International Version (NIV)

In their hearts humans plan their course,
    but the Lord establishes their steps.

If I’m not sure what to do (when overwhelmed or facing a barrier of some sort) then I stop and ask the Lord about it.  He knows my situation in addition to the desires of my heart and usually answers in a way that draws me closer to Him.  Sometimes I am challenged in obeying His leading.  That is always a mistake.  Things always go better if I follow the leading of the Holy Spirit, usually to read my Bible or listen to Bible teaching.  The day that follows always goes better that way.

When we are battling an illness or caring for a loved one our personal resources are limited.  Additionally, we may never know when that reservoir of energy or cognitive capacity will run out so we must make our best guess and proceed accordingly.  Will new demands change everything?  It is really hard to be flexible when our hopes are dashed over and over again, less gets done, and we become overwhelmed. So we strive to keep our spirits high and go with the flow, right?  “Let go, let God” as the 12-Steppers teach? There is always tomorrow, right?

Plans changing repeatedly over the course of the day or night has dominated my past 5 years so much that I practically numb out when it happens again.  I am not sure if this is a good idea or not?  What follows for me is pursuing smaller and smaller tasks after answering the question:  what is most important?  Often what has happened next fits the category more of survival than enjoyable:  get that rescue remedy from the frig . . . I will help you walk to the kitchen . . . trust me and push yourself up to get your legs working again.  Don’t worry, you won’t fall.  I tell you, this principle of setting priorities gets REAL really fast when in a time of crisis!

That may be an extreme example for you, Gentle Reader, so I will just say this a different way.  We both will be o.k. if we set our plans before the throne of grace and let the Lord guide is in all things big and small.  He cares for the details of our lives.  As He orders our steps He also gives us the power to take those steps too.  What is most important always gets done this side of heaven.  We didn’t die because the bathrooms didn’t get cleaned or we had to eat canned meat for dinner!  Dwelling in the presence of my Savior is the best food, fitting for my soul anyways.  And that dwelling happens best when completely in the arms of our Heavenly Father who loves us so!

As my brother, Mike, has often said:  just keep moving forward.  Yup.  When I can I do.  And sometimes that means staying right where I am for a while.  Rest is important too ya know . . .  JJ

scripture, Bible, Christian, to do list, list, priorities, important, Proverbs 19:9