Home alone, the moment clarifies the mind
No distractions but the one in my tummy or bladder, alas step aside
The me that is Julie still wants for something more
Too much sorrow hath dimmed the light on this bumpy ride.
There is an up for every down, even ones ending in death
For to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord.
So how can I complain this side of heaven with so much goodness here
But have I weighted my health above all else, shrouding my view, my words?
Dragging along but making the hard choices needed to be made
Releases my beloved to pursue what makes him Steve one weekend —
Trusting that my Heavenly Husband will calm my fears, carry me through.
We shall have a truer assessment of my ability to live
When my Intended Beloved is not rushing to my crisis, again and again.
I still hate this illness. Oh Lord I know that You see
There’s so much more I want to do, to really be.
Feelings have led the train of my thoughts instead of faith
I must kick them to the caboose, the facts must reign.
How many blogs, how many lines of text
Must I spend before my heart
Rests not on my sleeve?
Sickness be damned.
I surrender to my Lord.
There is no other way forward.
In all things, Gentle Reader.
He must reign!
Yes, in all things.