Smaller Moments Mean More

When the mist on the pond lifts up to the air

The morning hath come and I give witness to life once again.

For I am up through the night, my old haunts hath returned

A way of coping, of living:  just what I gotta do for right now.

So I edit a magazine, make charts of treatments, plan for when I will be well,

Most folks would not notice the shifts ever so small

The wretched episodes continue albeit with shaking, less overall.

I had to gain courage to take more meds/more remedies than ever before

Go rogue to kill the monsters within with faith and every tool from this road.

“Parasites in the brain” sounds pretty scary might you agree?

Yet that is exactly where I have arrived so be that as it may

Find me spacey perchance to dream when restorative sleep comes that way.

The smaller treats of life mean more to me now in my softened state

I get to see them in slow motion and savior their texture, their smell even when awful like glue.

What is before me fills every moment in much more detail

Healing comes small before big so intentionally I walk through most of the day.

Don’t get me wrong, the chores fill more hours than they used to years ago

That ‘s just one part of the plan so is rest and in times of rest I believe answers we have found.

Wyoming, clouds, blog, metaphor, analogy, Chistian, faith, majesty, creation, God, sky, big
One does feel ever so small next to God’s majesty revealed in the big sky over Wyoming . . .

Navigating the Mine Field of Recovery

Those of you in treatment for a serious illness know what this title is all about:  trying to figure out what will bring recovery or remission without making you feel worse!  Oh yeah.  Patients battling chronic illness talk about “herxheimer reactions.”  That is where either die-off or some kind of healing crisis brings on worsening of symptoms and even new, noxious symptoms.  Not fun.  So what is a person to do?  Unless otherwise advised by your trusted healthcare practitioner, here are some things that have been helpful for me:

  • Slow down your treatment protocol or take a break in treatment.
  • Try only one new thing at a time and at a lower dose if possible.
  • Take binders such as benonite clay, activated charcoal, chitosan, and binders of heavy metals (e.g. Intestinal Metals Detox).
  • Drink extra fluids especially pure water.
  • Add some hot lemon water first thing in the morning on an empty stomach.
  • Eat bitter foods which help support liver and kidney drainage channels (such as select herbs, radishes, dandelion root tea).
  • Do what you can to keep your bowels moving at lease once every day, minimally!
  • Step up your preferred method of detox such as salt water baths, infrared sauna, colon hydrotherapy, and exercise as tolerated.  Even massage, physical therapy, and chiropractic care can help release waste products trapped in your tissues.
  • Add nutritional supports for detox as you can such as glutathione (or precursor of lactose-free whey powder), vitamin C-rich foods, and minerals (such as magnesium, Dead Sea salt baths, Celtic sea salt, Quinton Quintessentials, and the like).
  • Make rest a priority!  Healing takes a lot of energy!
  • Pray.  The Lord cares, hears, and will lead you unto Himself if we but call upon His name:  Jesus Christ.  There is no greater comfort than this Gentle Reader.

So this is where I am at these days.  Last month I had to take a nasty antibiotic for the same infection and it hurt me badly so I ended it at the short end of the recommended treatment range.  Then I stepped up nutritional supports before adding a new treatment.  I tried to add a new biofilm-buster when treating a gut infection and reacted poorly, so I will take a break from it for now.  This month I was able to tolerate hot lemon water with manuka honey which is a combo I have not tolerated in years!  Changing brands of glutathione helped me to start taking this critical element in the 3 phases of detox, yeah God!  Also, using a combination of binders has helped slow down some overnight convulsive episodes.  I hypothesized that killing infections  released  toxins inside of the bacteria and fungi targeted, contributing to an increase in episodes.  So these days I am really glad for the leading of the Holy Spirit, and a myriad of webinars from really smart researchers who suggested binders.  “Yeah God” for the relief that has followed.

Psalm, 7, 37, rest in the Lord, wait, patiently, Him, Lord, peace, Christian, healing

I guess then it is time for a nap.  No matter that it is a beautiful day outside.  Naps are a beautiful thingy too ya know.  Lord willing, I am going to get well!

Take care, JJ


Sometimes the night just passes unnoticed

SLEEPING_GIRL_TS4023-550x579Psalm 121

I will lift up my eyes to the hills— From whence comes my help? My help comes from the Lord, Who made heaven and earth.

He will not allow your foot to be moved; He who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, He who keeps Israel Shall neither slumber nor sleep.

The Lord is your keeper; The Lord is your shade at your right hand. The sun shall not strike you by day, Nor the moon by night.

The Lord shall preserve you from all evil; He shall preserve your soul. The Lord shall preserve your going out and your coming in From this time forth, and even forevermore.

I’ve heard this called the bedtime psalm.  Sure beats the one I grew up with:

Now I lay me down to sleep

I pray the Lord my soul to keep.

If I die before I wake,

I pray the Lord my soul to take.

The childhood prayer above offers me no comfort during a night like last night.  If the worst outcome of 15 or so total hours of noxious symptoms last evening and overnight were to repeat itself, I would need the truth of God’s word on my mind and in my heart.  Some wishful rhyme uttered as a “prayer” has only the fleeting power of a feel-good sentiment.  It wouldn’t refresh my husband enough either to feed me or carry me to the bathroom again.  Only God’s word has the power to transform our fragile lives, and I know He will transform mine someday.  I know he sustains my beloved with supernatural strength.  Only God’s word provides sustaining grace for all who suffer, for when sleep will not come.

This afternoon I must somehow get to 2 medical appointments despite the lethargy, pain, sweats, stiffness, low grade neck headache, ringing in my ears, and so on.

Oh Lord, I do hope these trials end soon!  Maybe I can nap later this afternoon?  Yawn.

Maybe I don’t want to go to bed

peanutschristmascure74045_10151380532502386_87513810_nMaybe I don’t want to go to bed tonight.

If I go to bed, I might have seizure attacks and that is not fun.

If I go to bed and get up in time to do my morning treatment, I won’t have enough time to take a post-treatment nap before an appointment at noon.  Then I’ll probably want to rest after the appointment so my schedule is going to be messed up anyways.

But what if I stay up and get hungry again?  I don’t have enough protein already prepared to satisfy my hunger because this diet is just too weird.  For instance, I thought the son-of-the-owner-whose-been-cutting-meat-and-cheese-his-whole-life was going to laugh when I asked if they sold wild hog meat.  He smiled and said it was illegal to sell it in Indiana, just like it’s illegal to sell deer meat (aka venison).  Geez.  Wild hog on Amazon?  Yup, that’s what my Electrodiagnostic Naturopath told me to do.  She’s ordered alligator online before due to food allergies.  Alligator?

Is anyone else laughing in addition to me?  GEEZ!

So we had Cornish hens for Thanksgiving and I think there’s going to be a repeat menu of the little chickies for Christmas.  But for tomorrow, I’m a little stumped as to what to eat.  I guess I’m going to have to negotiate the pre-Christmas grocery store mania tomorrow after my after-appointment, post-treatment nap.  Could be fun, actually.  It will make me take a walk since I’ll have to park so far away from the store to get a parking spot!  Could be good.

Then again, maybe I will go to bed now.  Thanks for the chat.  It’s like I’m talking to Linus of the Peanuts comic strip.  And if I was talking to Snoopy, I know he’d understand too . . .  Goodnight.  :J